Friday, February 24, 2012

LLNP Long Life and Prosperity

A year ago, I started noticing on a common trend from my Nigerian friends when it comes to wishing people a happy birthday.  I have seen stuff like

Tara Thomas
HBD Amaka, LLNP.

Ijeoma Onyechie
Samantha HBD,LLNP

I am sorry but I naively thought that it was a form of title of some sort. You never can tell these days, Nigerians come up with something new and hip every day until I figured HBD was Happy birthday but LLNP meant what? On Amaka’s wall I saw the word LLNP so many times so I decided to ask someone and they told me it meant “Long life and prosperity”. * the light bulb comes on in my head*
In my own opinion it is a birthday wish, you might as well write out the whole word especially if it is heartfelt, Face book has made it easy for one to wish people a happy birthday even when you don’t remember all you need to do is glance at the “Birthdays” section on you Face book page and alas you know whose birthday it is and start typing, HBD, LLNP. Hmm.
Just to let you know, I wont do that to you. So when it is your birthday you would receive at least a 15 word birthday greeting.
I don’t know how you feel about the abbreviation of a birthday greeting, it doesn’t seem appropriate but yet again should I say is there a proper way of wishing someone a Happy Birthday? I want to know what you think.
By the way I went to the Timaya concert last weekend and I got a copy of his cd called LLNP. I just looked at the CD an hour ago and realized that. What an irony? Happy Friday everyone.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012


It is very obvious that there is so much double standard in society today and men and women alike are victims of the double standard. A certain gender has to do one thing while the other is exempt and vice versa. Who is responsible for these double standards, the finger will always point to society but I think it starts with each individual. You cannot keep blaming society for your own problems when you can actually fix them or at least make a difference to your own circumstance. There are a lot of them in society so the blogpost  will come in parts.
1.       Once past the age of twenty five, one is expected to be done with college and embarking on a rewarding career and also to embark on the MR or MRS degree with a significant other. The MRS degree seems to be the one that everyone looks forward to as in the Nigerian culture all those old aunties will see you at gatherings and start asking. Here is a typical conversation that will ensue between one of those aunties and a young girl that is past 25 or past 30

AUNTY: How are you dear, I heard you are doing your masters now
YOUNG LADY: Yes I am, I am graduating in the summer”
AUNTY: Oh really, that’s nice oh, so when are we wearing your aso ebi, when are you introducing us to the man.
YOUNG LADY: Aunty which man?
AUNTY: Do not pretend as if you don’t know what I am talking about, Julia got married last year, and Priscilla is getting married in August, so when is your wedding?
YOUNG LADY: Oh that, (with the little fake laugh) We are praying oh.
AUNTY: What type of prayer, please be quick about it, how old are you now? 26? 27?
AUNTY:  Oh 29, Bring him home quick so you can start having children, you know once you turn 30 , the child bearing…..

 By this time the auntie’s advice has already been tuned out. Acquire Selective hearing if you can. Imagine if it was a guy the aunty was talking to, she would not even come close to the marriage thing, this would be a typical conversation.
AUNTY: My boy, see how much you have grown. You are looking so handsome
YOUNG MAN: (Smiling) I know, thank you
AUNTY: So what are you up to these days, your mom said you are at Stanford, you are currently doing your Masters.
YOUNG MAN: Yes ma. I am also an Intern at Microsoft
AUNTY: Oh, waoh, that is very impressive, keep it up. You know nowadays your education will land you a good job, and seeing Stanford on that resume ( doing the little dance) that is guaranteed entry, keep it up my boy, next thing now we need to see your new car and house, don’t forget to invite me to the housewarming oh…..

Nonsense. Can you see what I am talking about?, the lady didn’t even mention the “F” word. Yes I said it, the F word, and take your mind out of the gutter. I meant Female. She didn’t even ask him if he had a girlfriend or if he was getting serious with anyone. Men are exempt because they are believed to be providers, they are supposed to develop their lives, have fun and date as many women as they please because their penile expiration date is much further than that of a female.The “agbaya” aunty did not even encourage the girl to have a career.  This is my own opinion and I could be wrong, times have changed, this is post World War 1 were women and children were at home cooking, cleaning and sewing, women can vote, women go to school and they can also get jobs. We should be treated equally with men. I believe that even at twenty six or twenty seven you can date, travel and enjoy life, 
Marriage is not always the ultimate thing even though society makes it so. The nuns and monks who have dedicated their service to God and have chosen not to marry are not lesser humans in that thinking, it is a personal choice. I am tired of my female friends feeling pressured because of age to get married, and then they marry and then marry the wrong person. Marry because you want to be happy, marry because you are in love with that person and you complement the person not complete the person (some people get the concept mixed up, pretty bad thinking if I must say, because if you are half of a person and the other half chooses to walk away, you are back to square one).  All eligible single ladies that cannot handle too much talk about marriage at family gatherings or parties should buy earphones or develop selective hearing. I have said my own oh!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012


To my amazing readers and fellow bloggers who have supported me, i want you all to know that i love you with all my heart. I wish you all peace, happiness, long life and prosperity as we celebrate yet another Valentines Day. Hope you have tons of fun today and i hope to hear lovely Valentine stories at the end of the day.

Thursday, February 9, 2012


"It has to be Brazilian hair or nothing, i don't even do lace front wigs, so synthetic hair is not an option"
" She just broke my $300 Louis Vuitton glasses"

"I am sorry honey but you wont catch me with last season's Louis Vuitton purse"

"Why don't you have a Blackberry, how do you expect our relationship to work?"

" i want a pink Range Rover for my thirtieth birthday" (second year in a row she is turning 30)

"I want iPad 3 for Christmas"

Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Katie Spade, Aldo, Prada,Versace, Calvin Klein, Coach , Apple, Blackberry, Android, Brazillian Hair, Remi Hair,Mercedes, BMW, Range Rover,,, the list is endless, i could go on and on because we consumers are faced with so many Brand names and different models keep coming out and we have to keep keeping up with the brand name epidemic.
The Brand name syndrome has caught a lot of people, they are so consumed with getting a lot more of these things and  it also defines their identity. I met a fool that thought that his Louis Vuitton belt was all there was to his life and he seemed to regard people who didn't have an brand name clothing as nothing. 
A certain class of people can afford name brand things without breaking a sweat, the other class will owe money to get name brand stuff so that the can belong. The point is the first class of people have accumulated money, the other class are just trying to look like they have money, trying to impress people who don't even like them and it makes them one thing. BROKE!!!!!!!!
My own perspective on Brand Name is for one, its not a bad thing, it is absolutely and terrifically awesome if you can AFFORD it. If you can pay cash for any of the above, that will be fine.  I have come across people who will not pay off their student loans but will flash their latest Gucci sunglasses or their Louis Vuitton purse from this season at you. 
There are men who love to show high quality but these thirsty men will never buy you a drink at the club.If you check their account balance at the ATM machine, its either low or just plain broke. The funny thing is that they may have borrowed the money to get them into the club.

Some ladies drip and smell of money in their Louboutins and their Brazillian hair but they cant even pay rent,they may be paying off their acquisitions on a credit card which will take a while. 
I will not spend too much money on anything that will not appreciate in value like a house or expensive jewellery. I don't have shares with Coach or Louis Vuitton even though i like their stuff but spending $300 on sunglasses that my friend may sit on in my car and break the frames would be ridiculous. The Hair craze is also another syndrome, the most important thing you need to know whether it is synthetic, Brazillian, Indian Remi ,Futura and what not you decide to put on your hair, realize that it is NOT your hair. I get excited with hair and after six weeks the hair goes in the garbage can, so whether it is Italian, Nigerian, Brazilian hair it is not your hair. 

Wednesday, February 1, 2012


It’s a new month and I woke up this morning to see the picture of this brand new Blackberry innovation. Sleek!!!!!!!!! This phone is not meant  for people selling goods in the market or a typical college student or a people who are living from hand to mouth but trying to keep up with the Jones’s. This is not a phone for having money this month and being broke next month. This is for tHose top of the notch executives, imagine a CEO of a corporation using the same phone that a college student carries in their pocket. Hmmm!!! Levels, so Blackberry came up with a solution and brought out not the Mercedes version but Porsche.
So what are the features oh!!!
 1.2GHz Qualcomm MSM8655 CPU and 768MB of RAM,
 2.8-inch touchscreen with a resolution of 640 x 480
 1,230mAh battery, GPS, NFC and 
5MP rear camera with an LED flash and 720p HD video capture.
And so???? 768 MB of Ram. Abeg I will keep my desktop at home.

Also apart from whatever material that was used to build the chassis of this product that makes it expensive ( Lord knows what it is), I would personally not buy it. Prospective husband please use this money to buy my engagement ring or invest it towards something productive and rewarding (smile). What is the essence of the phone, is it not to receive and make phone calls, text and just be accessible?  Valentines Day is coming up in 13 days and I know some UK and Middle Eastern girls will want a man to prove their love by buying them is new expensive machine. While you are doing that I will be here * chewing my gum and rolling my eyes* until you wake up.

Anyway  I read Tunde Ednut’s tweet about a guy who bought the phone today and broke the phone within a few hours of the same day. You want evidence.

Courtsey: Tunde Ednut Tweet
After my above statement. Are you still going to buy the phone?
By the way Happy New Year and New Month.